I'll lift you up, I'll never stop, you know I'll take you to another world.

That moment of not knowing what to think when you check your phone after not looking at it for a while and having a text from that one guy you've been waiting for...

So I get out of dance, go to check my phone, expecting the usual: no text, no missed call, nothing.

One text.

I unlocked my phone to see who it was, and sure enough, "Joe" was on the screen. 


Not anything special, at all.

Just "Who is this???????" 

So I just said "Its ashley."

He didn't text back yet.

Not entirely sure if he's being legit. 

My Facebook status was "that awkward moment when three people who had your number ask "who is this"... -_-"

So I'm not sure if he's just joking with that, or being serious.

Because I'm gonna tell you something.

Twice in the summer/school year, he did the same thing.

It was after we weren't friends.

He said "Who is this?" and I just said ".. really?" and he was like "Ya who is this?" and I was like "Its Ashley. Isn't this Joe?" and he said "No"

Me: Then who is this?
Him: His friend

Me: but its Joe's number. what's your name?
Him: I wont say and he left his phone at my house

Me: oh.

Him: Ya do u still like him

Me: not anymore.

Him: Y not

Me: he'll never like me so I guess I'm just gonna give up on liking him.

Him: O how do u no tht

Me: i don't know for a fact but its just my instinct..

Him: O well i gtg bc im going over Joe's so he's gonna have his phone

Me: mhkay, bye.

I remember all of that by memory.

By the way, that WAS Joe. Not his friend. 

 

The second time he did it, he pretended he was a friend again and asked if I thought me and Joe would ever be friends again and why I gave up on him.

I told him "its really up to Joe to decide that. i gave up on him because i realized he would never like me, and he just chose not to be friends i guess"

Wanna know what I miss?

Sitting in the backseat of my parent's cars because I was texting him everyday and I didn't need them to ask who I was texting.

Staying up until like one in the morning to text him.

Playing the "If you had to would you..." game.

Conversations.

Him.

When I said I didn't want to be friends with him anymore and I didn't care, I lied.

I do want to be friends with Joe.

I do care.

I do miss him.

But I miss HIM. 

The old Joe.

I want to tell him he's changed. I want to tell him I do miss him, but I don't have feelings for him. I do want to give him that five page note, but the only way is through Tessa and she won't do it unless she reads it and I don't want her to read it. I want to give it to him, but I don't know when/how.

):

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